Friday, January 14, 2011

I Am....


I live in a realm where car bombs and 9mm pistols are the norm.  At night when you go to sleep, I stay awake and mingle with thieves, killers and terrorists.  The world that you only see in dreams and nightmares is what I walk tall in. 

You window shop to spend time with your friends on a balmy Saturday afternoon.  I use windows at shops to pick up tails and to check my six.  You use paintballs to play games.  I use hollow points to end wars.  You exercise to look good on South Beach.  I exercise because it’s the difference between life and death.  You watch CNN for headlines on world events.  I’m the reason CNN is still in existence.  Your job description is to sit at a desk and push papers.  My job description is to be non-descript.  Your reality, a reality of Starbucks double Macchiatos, 50” plasma-LED televisions and passive political debates, is courtesy of the efforts of myself and other colleagues.  My reality, a reality of C-4 detonations, pock marked chest scars and Brazilian Jui-Jitsu, is fraught with a maze of deception, disrepute, danger. 

Politicians needs me but are apt to forget I exist whenever the opportune moments reveal themselves.  In a world of civility and scraps of paper littered with unalienable rights, it is best that Presidents and aspiring politicians keep their distance and adhere to their preferred arms length distance saying of plausible deniability. 

You belittle me by describing me as a spy.  You sugar coat what I am by calling me a covert operative.  You down play my integral role in the safety of your reality by labeling me an intelligence officer.  You whisper of my existence in small circles as if your hushed tones keep me at bay. 

I pierce the world with steel grey eyes, taking in everything, cataloguing it, making sure you sleep well tonight.  My outlook on the world is grim. Too little time, too many people to kill.  The difference between the United States and everyone else is not the Declaration of Independence or our insatiable desire to consume special sauced Big Macs.  I am the difference.  The enemy knows I exist but they don’t know when I will come.  They don’t know what I look like.  They only know that because I exist, they have one foot in the grave.  They cannot escape my wrath.  They cannot stop the Tolling Bell.  

I am a mercenary.  
I am death.  
I am an assassin.  
I am vengeance.  
I am the epitome of America’s first response against terrorism.  
I am Hell, but just a bit warmer.  
I am Nathanial Reaper.  

Sunday, December 19, 2010

A Fifth Grade Book Report

Somewhere, on some book written by Clive Cussler, there is a quote.  “A book by Clive Cussler is like a visit from you best friend.”  While reading my favorite authors, that quote couldn’t be closer to the truth.  Every page I turn, every scene I become enraptured in, and every character I become enamored with feels like it is part of me.  At the end of every novel by the favored “half dozen” I become desolate and melancholic that the journey has ended.  I spend the rest of the day thinking about the characters, imagining the way they made and broke bonds, what new traits they possess after the novel, and thinking about the next novel and what I can expect.  The reverie is interrupted when I must continue to live in reality and not another, more welcoming reality created by the “half dozen”. 

But as each great novel comes to an end, there is always that next novel that can make my heart beat with renewed literary vigor once more.  And though The Doomsday Key by James Rollins was a wild, rump stinging ride though history, religion and espionage, I am not comforted in my thought that a new novel from the “half dozen” will infiltrate my hands and fill my nostrils with the sharp sweetly pungent odor of fresh paperback paper.  As I listen to the spine crack and break, I can already hear the characters waiting to be read, itching to start there adventure.  And that feeling is one of the greatest feelings on this Earth.  It’s no wonder that the written word has been crafted and cast into dozens of art forms from poetry, screenplays, plays, novels, codices, magazines, etcetera.  It moves us into living, something that we must do if we are to survive life.  Commander Gray Pierce can attest to that.  

Jesus Speed, 

Lord Evan Burwell

P.S.  Mileage since last posting:  4.58

Monday, November 15, 2010

It's Too Late at Night to Play Jokes

Are you f***ing kidding me?

http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/truehoop/miamiheat/news/story?id=5809452

I'm not going to lie, I dislike Lebron James with a passion.  I can forgive a lot of things.  I can forgive Kobe Bryant for his lack of judgment.  I can forgive Mark Richt (UGA Head football coach) for sucking it up this season, cause I know he's coming back next season with a vengeance.  And I can forgive it when my girlfriend drink all of my milk...just barely :).  But I cannot forgive a guy, who gets paid $90+ million dollars that entertains us by dribbling a ball and placing it into a cylindrical receptacle and makes my life miserable for months because he can't decide where he wants to go play his game.

But wait there's more...

Time magazine, a most storied of the storied magazines in publication history, has "humbled" Lebron James by nominating him as Time's Person of the Year.  There must be a heavy supply of cocaine laced air inside Time's headquarters because they can't be serious.

1930-Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi
1940-Winston Churchill
1948-Harry S. Truman
1952- Queen Elizabeth
1959- Dwight D. Eisenhower
1963- Martin Luther King Jr.
1989- Mikhail Gorbachev
2008- Barack Obama
2010- ???Lebron James???

That should speak for itself.  This award is supposed to be given to the individual who has made the most influence in the world in the given year, not the person who has acted like a selfish, throw his coach under the bus, leave your hometown in the dust, self proclaimed king.  The other nominees include individuals who have made real change and shown real perseverance and attitude on a world that is in desperate need of more.

Lebron James, I don't even know if you donate to charity, unless you count signing with the Miami Heat.

But I can't blame Lebron, because it's the people at Time Magazine that nominated him.  That damage has already been done.  Lebron's image is certainly on thin, cracking ice.  The best thing he can do in this situation is to immediately withdraw his name from contention, because if he doesn't, and actually beats out the other nominees, the hypothesis that America is in a moral downward spiral will finally have its conclusive proof.

And just to pile on more hatorade... Lebron's Wishy-Wash

Adios,

Lord Evan Burwell

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Anatomy of a Deadly Observation

Six billion souls....


Six billion lives....

How are we still here?  Hurricane Katrina.  BP Oil Spill.  2004 Tsunami.  9/11.  The War in Iraq, soon to be Iran.  Cholera outbreak 2010.  Somalia.  Darfur.  

That is just a sample of the worldwide epidemic that we face.  The epidemic that I speak of is death. Today, I suddenly remembered the statistic that there are six billion people with whom I share oxygen with everyday; there are six billion mortals with whom I can blame global warming on.  I'm not even counting the trillions of other creepy, crawly organisms out there.  But what I'm wondering is how there are still so many of us.

I turn on CNN and five people are dead in a car bombing in Iraq.  I happen to watch the news every once and a while and each time there is a deadly car crash where multiple people lose their lives.  I'm not even counting the aforementioned disasters.  So with all of the seemingly endless death and destruction in our midst, how does the global population continue to grow?

Don't get me wrong, I completely understand the concept of birth and death rate, but how come there aren't any stories about hundreds of babies being born in a day.  Or here's a better idea, show good, happy, stories during the news.  I'm not callous but I don't necessarily want to come home and turn on the Morbid hour.  Life isn't a fruity pebble, no.  But life also isn't a plate of cyanide waffles either.  

So back to my original question...

If thousands of people of dying every day from terrorists attacks, natural disasters, roller coasters, giving birth, old age, sickness and other natural causes, then how do we continue to replenish our ranks.   It seems as if we are declining, but I guess I will have to have faith that a lot of you out there are taking the Bible to heart.  Boom baby boom.  

Toot-a-loo, 

Lord Evan Burwell

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

What If I Told You...

...that the Tour de Redemption is not a sprint.  And what a path it is.  It starts with a single step, foot shaking as it hits the ground for the first time.  Before you know it, you're taking two steps at a time...three steps...four.  And then you're off, resembling a purebred stallion at the Kentucky Derby.  

Most people will tell you that it's not about the end of a journey, but rather the journey itself.  For Lance Armstrong, his will to ride a bike again helped him overcome the deadliest cancer for men.  For Paul Pierce, his love for the game of basketball helped him come back to the game after getting stabbed repeatedly at the beginning of his Hall of Fame career.  And for Tiger Woods, pre-marriage, it was his zeal, mixed with his father's determination, that led all of us to stare, unblinkingly, at a TV screen as a pock-marked golf ball rolled lazily down manicured grass into a hole in the ground, effectively overcoming racial tensions in a sport that has seen its fair share.

However, just because they are superstars, the masters of the generation, doesn't mean that we all don't have journeys of our own.  When people tell me what they do, I'm not very impressed.  But when people tell me how they got there, how they became a shark within a pool full of other sharks, my ears perk up and I'm sitting with rapt attention.  So, in my way of introducing myself, I'm letting you know how I came to be here today, in hopes of helping you understand what this blog is all about.

764 days ago, I underwent surgery.  I get a few questions, here and there, asking whether it was major or not.  All surgery is major.  But mine was complicated.  In 28 words:

I've had Crohn's Disease for fifteen years and it got back, quick.  Surgery happened and I could not walk upright without pain for months.  I still have pain.

Back to the present:  I took a journey, through my mind and body and told myself that I could overcome this obstacle.  I started out at a snails pace and finished past a cheetah.  My journey isn't over.  No journey ever is.  We are all constantly going forward, but what you should come away with is a deep, cog-turning knowledge of your self.  You should not only understand how you tick but you should know what kind of watch you are.   You should be able to predict your body and mind, with the accuracy of the mind.  And that's what I was able to do.

What was my Tour de Redemption like?  Nothing major; a few half marathons, a second chance at law school, and a dog who will forever be my best friend.  But there were times along the journey that I learned things that I will never be able to put into words, much less a blog.  The human life is intricate and inexplicable in it's delicacy, fortitude, and determination; I think we all can agree.

What I am telling you is to find your own Tour de Redemption.  Maybe you are already running it.  Maybe you've crossed the finish line and your downing a liter of protein to fuel up for more.  Or maybe, you just don't know what the hell I'm talking about.  Don't worry, you will.  For those that do, slow down on your personal Tour, embrace it, smell it, touch it, taste it, see it, and hear it.  Your Tour is like your favorite dish from home, it's there for the time being and when it's done you find yourself struggling to recreate it, so that you could experience it once.  Why?  Because it makes you feel alive.  And that's what we are all struggling to do...live.

Ta ta, for now,

Lord Evan Burwell